Pussy Riot and the Power of Art

I’m going to begin this post by writing about my Gran’s 70th birthday, otherwise it might appear a little tame compared to the titled news. I went to Margate with my family and loved being near the sea, as well as the second-hand furniture shops and vintage stores. We stayed at the Walpole Bay Hotel which I would have liked to look more at as it is a living museum, giving it an eerie quality. Whilst in Margate I got to see Tracey Emin’s new work at the Turner gallery in ‘She Lay Down Deep Beneth the Sea.’ Emin tends to polarise people, but having seen her exhibition at the Hayward, I am ever the more passionate about her work. I feel that she is more of a writer than a visual artist, which some people may think is strange, but as she has said herself, she doesn’t care if she’s not the best visual artist in the world because ‘that isn’t my job.’ That’s not to say she’s not very skilled at the visual – she can make embroideries that look like paint! But, to me, it’s about more than just the visual, it’s about the story and the emotion.

The exhibition was free but I would urge anyone who sees it to spend the £2 for a headset so that you can really explore the work. What I found especially interesting, which you would be able to gather without the headset, is the inclusion of JMW Turner and Auguste Rodin alongside Emin’s work. Erotic nudes are displayed in a corridor-like room and seeing as the work shown was from the 1800s to the early 1900s, it makes me wonder what people find so crude and shocking about Emin’s work. There is a juxtaposition of gender here. I’m not sure I can offer any insight as to why Emin depicting her own body is so controversial. Perhaps people see it as self-indulgent, or cocky, but surely, writing and painting what you know best is the most natural thing to do? What I remember hearing Emin say through my headset, and what I believe also, is that although you are creating from yourself, once placed in public, the meaning transcends so that these bodies become not just Emin, but every woman.

Photography Copyright © 2012 Paul Singer – streetpix.co.uk

I recently bought these pictures and some footage (which I’m still awaiting) of my performance at Finger in the Pie. I realised that I had forgotten to mention that after my feature slot for IYAF and when one audience member stated he was ‘too critical’ to give an opinion, I pressed him for one. The first comment her made was that ‘it was very… feminine.’ He said a bit more and ended with something about being myself, but this comment stuck in my head. At the time I was a bit taken aback, but the more I thought about it the more it annoyed me. I reflected on the poems I had read, and a lot of them were autobiographical ones, or else ones about female characters ‘Cinderella’ and one quoting Sylvia Path with ‘the woman is perfected,’ plus another based on a Russian film called The Mirror. So, I can understand that someone would then make the comment that they were feminine.

However, the thing that annoyed me about this statement was that it was pitched as a negative. I am capable of writing poetry that is neutral or genderless and as I have written less of the autobiographical, this is more so the case, but there was an implication in the comment that feminine is the opposite of masculine. The context appeared to deal with those pesky binary oppositions that equate the masculine with right and the feminine with wrong. It begs the question, if my poetry is feminine, then what poetry is masculine? Or is masculine the elite poetry and feminine poetry just the Other? Can a man write feminine poetry? This idea was bothering me. However, much of the time I want my poetry to express my views, and some of what I write is as a Feminist, an activist, and… guess what? As a woman. So, if someone sees my poetry as ‘feminine’ I don’t mind. My problem, as I said before, is the assumption that ‘feminine’ equals ‘bad’.

I think it’s an incredibly loaded statement to describe someone’s writing is feminine. In some ways feminine writing has a lot to do with modernism, stream of consciousness and writers such as Virginia Woolf and Sylvia Plath. Some say that this style can also been seen to be adopted by James Joyce, a man. If I am counted alongside these writers, I won’t complain!

There are also writers such as Dorothy Parker who I love. But just because Parker writes as a woman, and as a feminist, does this mean her writing is feminine? Is feminine writing lady-like? Does it wear lipstick? A quote on the back of her collected works by Peter Ackroyd says ‘she managed to express her real feelings in stanzas which snap and glitter like a Chanel handbag,’ which I like. But this idea of emotional writing, as well as writing from the body, is synonymous with feminine writing.

In a discussion I wrote about during Poetry Parnassus, women writers discussed our place in literature today. The consensus seemed to be that women should do more than write from the body, especially as they pointed out, that some publishers (referencing Africa) will put a body on the cover of a book by a woman, even when unrelated. I agree that women can and should write about everything, but I don’t think that writing from the body should be excluded. If it feels natural for you to do so, then by ignoring that desire surely you are placating to a patriarchal idea that the feminine writing is ‘wrong’?

‘Oxymoronic writing: perhaps, but it’s reality that is oxymoronic.’

This criticism has made me want to rush through Hélène Cixous essays. Perhaps the critic at the event wanted my performance provide a more bisexual offering? But then, as a woman on stage, perhaps anything I could have said would have heralded me as ‘feminine’. As a Feminist, part of me would like to think I can write whatever way I chose. However, I also acknowledge that there is a difference, to write as a woman. And I would rather embrace it, play with and experiment with it, than ‘function within masculine thinking [and] restrict [myself] to the range of its logocentric vocalizations’ (Elmer G. Weins).

Moving on… Pussy Riot are a group of Feminist using art and music to protest against Putin. The group has over ten-members, anonymised through colourful balaclavas, and grabbing attention in miss-matched tights and dresses. I read about it on The Guardian website and found out that three members have been arrested and the rest are in hiding. One member, referred to as Squirrel, states Putin is ‘scared of girls’ which gives the article a punchy ending. However, these young women are incredibly brave and serve to remind us of why women around the world should be Feminists and support struggles such as those the population of Russia currently face. As Poetry Parnassus reminded us, free speech is often taken for granted in countries such as the UK. Maybe that’s why I’m not ashamed to be a ‘feminine’ writer – because we still have a reason to fight, and we have something to say about the feminine experience of the world.

xxx

Rainbows

[trigger warning: sexual abuse]

I’ve called this post rainbows because of the mix of sunshine and rain both literally and metaphorically. I’ve just come back from Latitude and have so much to get on with I don’t know where to start, so I thought I’d begin here. Here’s a summary of what went down, in the form of a list:

Things I saw:
lots of random comedians eg. Chortle Student Awards
Lianne Le Havas
Laura Marling
Los Campesinos!
cabaret dance routine
Catherine Brogan
Intensi-T
Scroobius Pip
Bat For Lashes
Tom Deacon
Nick Helm & the Helmettes
Abandoman
Alabama Shakes
St Vincent
Glen Hansard
Rufus Wainwright
London Community Gospel Choir
a few random things I can’t remember

[actually all the above were amazing too but either I’ve seen them before or not seen enough or want to see again to see properly at their own gig]

Highlights:
Bon Iver
Bwani Junction
Tiny Dragons (hey, new fave band)
Don’t Flop (poets ftw!)
Shappi Khorsandi
Kate Tempest’s Brand New Ancients
Rosy Carrick
Janalle Monae
Josie Long
Michael Kiwanuka
Sabrina Mafouz
Katie Bonna & Richard Marsh
Benjamin Zephaniah
Hollie McNish
Jess Green

Sad to have missed:
Ben Howard
Lana Del Rey
Daughter
Slow Club
More I-Arena bands (such a trek there)
Metronomy
The Antlers
Chairlift
First Aid Kit
Sam Riviere, Hanna Silva, Gemma Seltzer & lots of poets I should have seen
John Peel’s Shed
Soko
Tall Ships
John Cooper Clarke – too packed out 😦
a play about the Diggers
Sbtrkt & Zola Jesus (major clashes)
Paul Weller

If you want to find out about it in more detail, you can read up on my article at the UEA Concrete website. In the article, I don’t mention that just before Latitude Rosy Carrick officially confirmed her performance at the event I’m organising. She’ll be representing the inspirational professional poet for the evening and I’m really excited to have her on board. I also had responses from a couple of other poets, so in order to thank them, here’s a little linkage to their websites: Hannah Silva and Sophia Blackwell. Hannah Silva is based in Devon at the moment therefore the gig payment would barely cover her costs (free travel for poets and musicians anyone?) When I got Sophia Blackwell’s email I had already accepted Rosy Carrick, but was tempted to put them both on… before I remembered I’m making quite a big loss on the event as it is. They’re all amazing poets anyway and I urge you to check them out.

Prior to Latitude I had a headline slot at the International Youth Arts Festival in Kingston, at The Cricketers pub. I had taken on some of the promotion and think I blew things out of proportion in terms of how successful they would be. Let’s remember, marketing is a full time job! I felt I did the best I could and spent a lot of time and money flyering, as well as getting it advertised on various online avenures. However, it’s made me rather shaky about the event I’m doing in August because there was a complete lack of audience. I don’t even know if one person came that wasn’t either one of the poets, came with the poets or was a member of the IYAF staff. I brought about 7 people along myself but I’m unsure anyone paid to get in. Although a few of the acts had actually pulled out last minute, the guy that filled in as host did such a rushed job of it that it came across quite disrespectful, even asking if we really wanted an interval and giving the impression he couldn’t wait to leave. I was bitterly disappointed with the turn out but everyone still gave a good show. I feel I have to take some responsibility for the lack of audience, but don’t know how I come improve on this for next time. Other reasons that were suggested were the location of the pub being residential, rather than in the centre of Kingston, and just the bad luck that was the rainy weather.

Another eventful occurrence before Latitude involved self-proclaimed Strident Feminist, Caitlin Moran and a little social media website called Twitter. For those who don’t know, Moran is the author of the book How to be a Woman, which I have reviewed here previously (although disagreeing upon some issues, I was extremely enthusiastic and fanatic about the book). Anyway, I had been linked the following convo via Facebook:

quantick: Just mistook a woman walking slowly down the platform for a train. caitlinmoran: @quantick this is the worse rape alibi ever quantick: @caitlinmoran I had a platform ticket I and a lot of people (mostly in the UEA

Feminist Society) were confused about this dialogue from the onset. Admittedly, I then received a lot of mixed views about the intentions here. On one big hand there is the simple fact that the initial comment had nothing to do with rape at all. This begs the question, why would a comedian (and a Feminist comedian at that) make it about rape? With the continuation of the joke, it makes an obvious comment on the excuses some rapists can make, along the lines of a woman “asking for it” because she’s perhaps allowed things to go as far as kissing or foreplay. Still, I was confused about the intention of the initiation of this dialogue, and thought it was problematic that someone hailed as a modern Feminist icon in Britain should be making light of rape whatever the intention. Someone from the UEA FemSoc group stated that “Jokes about rape culture – any oppressive system – can be used to mock and destabilise rape culture. Jokes at the expense of victims undermine VICTIMS” and this struck a chord with me – if that was Moran’s intention. I also saw this Twitter convo:

caitlinmoran: SohoGuy: @melissa1992 @caitlinmoran It’s not a joke about rape itself. If anything, it’s a joke about the absurdity of excuses of men who are rapists ….  @SohoGuy Bless you for being bright xx

Okay, I can admit that I have come round to thinking that Moran’s intention was to mock and destabilise rape culture, however, what I am unhappy about is how the lady herself dealt with the whole situation. She immediately blocked anyone (including me) who called her out on the joke on Twitter. The only comments I saw were things like “I’m going to have to sit on this chair for a while, and feel sad. about the world.” They came across as really sarcastic and like she didn’t really give two shits. All I wanted (along with a lot of her fans) was for her to explain her intentions and defend her actions. Although I’m still not sure that making a joke about rape whatever the intention is the best thing to do for someone that many girls now see as an authority figure on Feminism, but I am willing to debate it as I can definitely see how it can help dismantle rape culture. However, the way Moran dealt with it was rude and immature, and just really disappointing for a lot of fans, who were willing to listen to what she had to say and would have liked her to use the opportunity to open a discussion on the subject. At the moment this is a crucial issue since the release of this statement about Daniel Tosh. It would have been great to get Moran’s opinion on rape jokes in the comedy scene. For the record, this is what I wrote on Twitter that got me blocked:

 

 

 

 

 

 

I also sent Moran this message on Facebook but have had no response:

Hi, Sorry to message you like this but I’m really disappointed about how you handled the reaction to the rape joke on twitter. A lot of us at UEA in the FemSoc really loved your book and just wanted an explanation/apology. As someone who has spoken out against rape jokes a lot of us were just confused about the whole thing. You have just blocked me rather than done this which just makes things worse. I understand you may not want the incident to reflect badly on you, but by ignoring the debate rather than engaging it’s not helping. I don’t think anything I said was offensive but I’m sorry if you took anything personally. I was confused and disappointed because you are someone that has made a lot of girls/women be like “yeah, I am a feminist”. So as someone who the public kind of take as an authority figure on the subject I just think a certain amount of responsibility should be taken with that. Given your posts about UniLad, this kind of thing just says to guys ‘hey, if she’s saying it’s okay then you must just have no sense of humour’. Please, don’t go down the Germaine Greer route. Note paragraph 5:http://www.squeamishbikini.com/2/post/2011/11/caitlin-moran-is-on-the-shelf.html. Also, we have 2 mutual friends so I hope you can take that to mean that I am cool and just wanting the best outcome. Thank you, Carmina x

Well, that’s quite enough of all that. Today I had a job interview at a school in Bethnal Green – how cool would it be to work around there? Very cool. I thought it went quite well but that I wasn’t as experienced or deserving of the job as others so didn’t expect to get it. I got a few phone-calls whilst on the tube on my way back from picking up my coursework and giving flyers to the Free Word Centre. I haven’t got the job just yet, but I’ve been asked to attend a session where I’ll be observed with a group of students. Scary stuff! Then I’m off to Margate for my Gran’s 70th birthday. Hopefully I’ll have time to make some meringues. I’ll be posting this a little after writing it as I’m waiting for my Latitude article to go up!

Edit: I’ve now found out I got the job! As of September I’ll be working as an English Mentor! Just need to sign the contract and hand in my notice to Sainsbury’s.

xxx

The Party’s Over

Hannah and I at Mystery Jets
Scroobius Pip at Dragon Hall
Birthday bowling 🙂
cards and pressies
Singing and miming along to I’m Just a Girl by No Doubt. I’ve had it up to here [with the patriarchy] ladies.
“You are not the victim of your life, you are the creator of your life” – wise words on the cubicle door at The Mill
fajitas and bean chilli
family reunion (dad’s side)


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A picture paints 1000 words today. For my birthday weekend I had a family BBQ, followed by friends and fajitas. We went to Bacchus in Kingston after a few drinks at The Mill. Matt and I got home around 3.30am. I went hungover for an eye appointment and was rewarded with a roast dinner. On my actual birthday I opened present and cards, and the sunshine stopped so Matt and I went bowling. We won one game each and played arcade games, pool and ate candyfloss.

He went back to Norwich for his job seekers appointment (but he has a job[s] now – yay!) I had a Chinese take-away with my parents and watched Towie, 56 Up and Desperate Housewives. I joined Matt in Norwich the next day.

We forego-ed a party sadly, but watched Eagle Vs. Shark. We saw Scroobius Pip at the Dragon Hall in Norwich, with great support including one of my favourite poets, Russell J Turner. I was working for Shake the Dust in Cambridge on Thursday and Friday. After the second workshop I dashed off, Cornish pasty in hand, to see the Mystery Jets in Brixton, with support from Theme Park and Slow Club.

Saturday night I went to my friend’s house, got more pressies and watched Two Lovers, stayed up until 3am and then was back at Sainsbury’s on Sunday, where I sprained my wrist.

xxx

It’s Friday, I’m In Love

Since Tuesday I’ve been out every night.  For the first time I was able to go to Norwich Poetry Club at The Bicycle Shop.  I was wearing small heels but inside was so dimly lit I had to be careful down the stairs and it took Hannah Walker a while to recognise me.  She was the only person I spoke to as I was feeling shy for some reason.  I also spoke to a woman briefly who I’d asked to sit next too.  I noticed she left before the last act and Luke Wright sat next to me.  He was hosting the show and although hosting is not a job that goes hand-in-hand with performance poetry (I am not so good at it!) he does it well.  He read a lot of new poems and they reminded me of old poems I’d read as a kid, a kind of naughty children’s poetry, and I mean this as a good thing (I’ve studied Children’s Literature after all).

Hattie Grunewald was the first feature for the evening, and although I already know and like her poetry I learnt about her successes so far – she has been taught by Caroline Bird after winning awarded withe the prestige of being a Foyle Young Poet, and had her poetry on the Underground, and as you can see on the link I’ve placed on her name, she has published books out there!  Slightly jealous if I’m honest.  I get annoyed at myself for not remembering details so I made a note of a couple of expressions I liked – the idea of someone tasting like a newsagents and eyes that rust.

John Osborne was next, promoting his new book.  Now, I’m far too promiscuous to state as Luke did, that he is my favourite poet, but he is up there.  He told a poem about a surprise party his girlfriend had organised and nobody turned up, which I related too… until he said it wasn’t true and “I don’t have a girlfriend, so the joke’s on you”.  This blend of fact and fiction inspired a poem I wrote that night, called Circumstances, which was also influenced by a poet called Tao Lin who I’ve been reading and I hoped for a kind of dry humour combined with a bleakness.  Anyway, back to John, and other favourites from the night include a poem about a guy that didn’t pay his pound into a syndicate at work the week they won, called ‘that money would have turned you into a bastard anyway’, and a heart-warming poem about a break-up.

The headline was Thick Richard, but if I’m honest, he wasn’t my favourite part of the evening.  He had a bit of a death theme, and I do like a theme, but still, I wasn’t impressed.  The crowd seemed to like it though, laughing where I couldn’t muster a chuckle.  The poem I most liked was something like ‘why don’t girls who like men like that like me?’ about seemingly nice girls going for bad guys.  He’s a chef though so maybe he could win my heart through my stomach.

It ended a bit past 9pm so I got to pop to The Birdcage for Lucy Day and The Knights’ EP release!  Inlay flaked out of supporting but the other acts, Blanche Ellis and Drew McDonnell were really great.  Before Lucy came on, I noticed the girl next to me put out some burning paper, and I was like fuck!  I smelt it and wondered what it was but didn’t even realise it was right next to me.  I think she only put it out because I turned my head and saw it, weird!

The gig was amazing and I’m so glad I went along!  I’ve listened to the collection of songs from Lucy a few times and had a few running around in my head.  I loved Forsaken and the lyrics have made me think about my own pursuits.  Sometimes I feel like I agree with the song, something does have to be forsaken.  For me, I’m so sucky at relationships, at times I think it’s just not meant for me – the happily, or not-so-happily married with kids life.  I could deal with the current patterns of my love life if only it meant I could be a success in other areas, namely my career.   We get told we can have it all, but maybe we can’t always.  I have this need and desire for love and for faithfulness and matrimony but I know the reality of this is near impossible, and that even if I did get married, it just may be a more serious example of how things end in tears.  It can be frustrating to have this desire but I guess it’s as much a part of living, to go through those kinds of ups and downs, as all the other elements of life, and should be embraced as such.  I think that since finishing my university work I feel a bit weird, like there’s so much I want to do that I don’t know where to start or if I have enough time.

Anyway, Wednesday I had a gig at The Birdcage myself.  I wore this dress with birdcages on it from Topshop, and an hourglass necklace from Urban Outfitters. Oh! And these cute bird earrings from UO as well.  I teamed it with green tights and my vintage Charles shoes.

My friends Helen and Laura came to watch and we went for a half-pint at spoons afterwards.  I knew all of the performers so I didn’t much feel nervous or anything, though I was a little unprepared as I kept switching my mind about which poems to read, and I did the new one, ‘Circumstances’ though it probably needs a lot of work, and I don’t know if people got the humour, or if I delivered it right.  The rest was okay, and I did a few by heart.

So, the list of performers… Bethan Williams, Jennifer Grey, Imogen Steinberg, Andy Bennet, Catherine Woodward, me and, headlining, John Osborne.  Jenny said she was nervous… in fact, so did Catherine and Andy!  Jenny always gives a confident reading though and was fine once she was up there.  Andy’s was really interesting and amazing considering he’d written them in the past 48 hours!  I knew why Catherine was nervous once she was up there, she gave a very different performance – all by heart and even including a cheeky lip-licking and winking!  After that, I was scared to follow her but think it went okay.

Last night I was a volunteer at Hannah Rose Jone’s Independently Fashioned.  I was on the door so met everyone and sorted out tickets (which turned out to be inking people’s hands) and all the stuff like that.  It was stressful at times, but I got used to it and it was actually really refreshing how lovely everyone was.  The only embarrassing thing was when one of the designers gave me £40 and I counted on my fingers to work out 40-25 to get her change.  I get so stressed when doing the simplest mental maths that my mind just goes blank.  I was to say ‘I’m not stupid, I got a B for GCSE maths, it’s just the pressure or something’ but I just end up looking a bit silly, oh well.  I should have done my research about the designers because it was a bit embarrassing not knowing know they were.

I didn’t get to see much but it did look like a great show, plus there were musicians Jordan Jackson and Cielo – most people at the end were asking about the band!  It was funny because one of the members asked to put some flyers on the table and said Jordan was good but that Cielo were a bit pretentious haha.  I had a good night, and Hannah even gave me a free headband for it, which I put on straight away and shall be wearing properly tonight!

xxx

UEA Literature Society Showcase: Autumn

Monday 22nd was the second edition of the Literature Society Showcase in the UEA Hive.  I had organised the one last summer pretty much single-handedly, but this time the whole committee got involved to make this one a success – and I think we pulled it off!  I was worried at first about the performers turning up, the audience turning up, and whether the equipment set-up would be okay.

The only thing that disappointed me was that, after being so happy that so many people turned up that we ran out of chairs, loads of people left towards the end which I found really disrespectful to the last acts who had sat through most of the night waiting to perform.  Especially as I was really looking forward to Hannah Jane Walker and Russell J Turner performing and thought it would end the night on a high – which it did, but it also REALLY pissed me off that people had left!  I guess I’m still learning about how to organise events though.  Next time we’ll have to have fewer acts and end earlier.

There were quite a few performers I’d put on the bill that I’d never seen before, and a couple of cheeky personal favourites were Ashley Johnson (an amazing acoustic act with a beautiful voice), and Grenouilles (a blend of voices, guitar and violin with poignant lyrics) and Billy Hallet (comedy act with hilarious anecdotes of “youths”).

The bill itself included a lot of acts I was already familiar with (obviously, as I put the bill together) and so here’s a run down for anyone reading this to check out:

Ashley Johnson

Mother Superior

King Laconic

Fuchsia Saville

Break

Grenouilles

Amy Staniforth

Joshua Jones

Billy Hallett

Break

Sula Mae

Me!

Robyn Comfort

Break

Late Arrivals Club

Hannah Jane Walker

Russell J Turner

Jake Miller hosted the event, which worked well for most of it, but I think I needed to brief him more about the acts as there were a few awkward moments.  I found his introduction for me funny: ‘some may say the next act put on this event just so she could perform’… partly true I guess!!

I was about to upload some pictures but it doesn’t seem to be working and time is of essence haha!  Well, about my own performance that night… I hadn’t practiced so didn’t expect much of myself.  I picked ‘Space Station’ as I know it by heart, however in attempting not to look at the page, I ended up missing out a stanza or two.  I then read a new one ‘The Social Network’ but regret doing so and never want to read it again; I’m starting to realise some poems should be kept as personal and not read out.  Lastly, I did a poem-song ‘Fix It’ and thought I’d probably just read it since I’ve never sung in front of an audience, other than drunken karaoke.  Until now!  I ended up singing the chorus, as is meant to be, and although I was paranoid about the echo of the microphone and whether I was standing right, and moved away from it to try to sound okay… I was proud of myself!  So… that, and getting a 67 in my latest essay… almost makes up for the amount of hangovers I’ve had recently!  Though I am having nightmares about the next essay I’m due back where the mark morphed into different low numbers… all lower than 45!

Anyway, I’m due to write a review on Luke Wright now, wondering whether if he Googles his name after and ends up reading this.  Most of the time I don’t think about people actually reading this, which has its downside… tending to be when I mention names or let slip in some emotional rant about unrequited love.

xxx