Last night I went to Farrago at the RADA bar, and had bagged myself a feature. My train was delayed and I didn’t know when I was on, but I didn’t stress myself about it because last time the show started at 8pm. I was pleased with my set but wished I slowed down a bit. The time is usually quite tight at Farrago, so it was probably better in this case to be quick so I didn’t have to cut my poems short. I was quite surprised at some of the noises the crowd made because I guess it just seems so natural to me, but I did deal with some emotional matters with a kind of raw honesty. I’m glad some people laughed at the last poem, ‘Lullaby’ because I see it as a kind of tragi-comedy poem about the ridiculous patterns of thought when you’re infactuated with someone, and wanting them to like you and hoping they feel the same way when they don’t. It was inspired by reading Sarah Kane and listening to Regina Spektor’s song of the same title… although for some reason I only have half the song.
A girl I met through an ex boyfriend came to perform again. I think I may have mentioned she came to the Tea Box gig as she’s trying to get into the poetry circuit. Her name’s Harriet Cramer and she’s soon going to get a collection published, so watch this space!
Quite a few people came up to me and asked for any websites etc. which was really cool! The second time someone has asked if I have anything published! To be honest, I still get rejected from most magazines, and have never tried to get a collection published. I don’t think I’m ready but I hope to be at that stage after the MA in Creative Entrepreneurship – if I get onto it! I need to go through my mass of poems to pick out the best. I also like the idea of working with a theme. Visually, I want it to be a cross between Laura Dockrill’s Mistakes in the Background, and Courtney Love’s Dirty Blonde. I’d love to have a more plain collection as well… oh to be a Faber New Poet!
I was also introduced on stage for a second time as something like ‘the angel of heartbreak’ which I was very embarrassed and uncomfortable about. I had to introduce the winner or the special heartbreak(er) prize – a pick-up line generator, Patrick Hearn. He said ‘see you at the pub after?’ which added to my embarrassment but I did what I usually do in those situations and giggled like a little girl, which is probably why people think it’s normal to call me an angel and are shocked at some of the things that come out of my mouth haha! But, hey, it’s just a shyness thing and it’s part of who I am so, irritating as it is, it is how I shall probably stay!
xxx