I tried to be poetic…

Don’t forget to keep checking out BadRobot Poetry.  Also, submit to my project. Put it on your to-do list. Start a to-do list in Excel. Put it on a post-it note. Put in on a mini-white-board. A chalk-board. Write it in your diary. Better yet, do it now. SUBMIT! SUBMIT TO ME!!!

Check out my review by Koel Mukherjee for Sabotage for my event, Carmina’s Poetry Tease (read it? See – I am good! Submit! Be a part of the next event!)

On Saturday I am going to my first workshop for Word’s A Stage, a project run by Apples & Snakes (who I seem to have to thank for a majority of my poetic success thus far). November 21st – keep the date in your diary. I will also be looking for people to eat dinner/Nando’s with. Or not. Because I will be incredibly nervous.

Now, on a more serious note, I just got informed via email of Amanda Todd’s suicide, as a result of cyber bullying. I cried at what she had to go through, and the knowledge of how common this reality is for teenagers in the age of technology. Not only does it highlight the issue of cyber bullying, but also that of slut-shaming, which is a massive problem that exists in society as a whole.

I know that, at school, I was turned against by certain individuals for being lonely and confiding in a friend, for publicly writing in an online-diary when my family life was hard and I felt I didn’t know who to talk to, for wanting to be normal around boys after five years of isolation from them and not knowing how. Wanting to be liked as a person but being seen for purely the physical.

When you’re a teenager, you get called a slut by boys and others girls because you gave a guy a blow-job once (and I’m talking over the age of consent here, 16+). When you’re an adult, you know that most women do give blow-jobs.  And you also know that any decent man will return the favour.

Part of this problem is that young people need more education on the emotional side of sex.  And speaking of emotions, we need to stop pretending that men don’t have any – this just leads to repression and a false idea of masculinity. And we need to stop acting like girls who express their emotions are crazy, that there’s something wrong with them.

Another issue is that in the adult world slut-shaming is still rife. And that’s why, mainstream songs, like Christina Aguilera’s Can’t Hold us Down, are important. There are double standards and they need addressing. This is confirmed by those commenting on Amanda Todd’s case, saying she ‘deserved it’. No. Nobody deserves to feel like life is not worth living.

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About carminamasoliver

I'm an ex-UEA writer from South London. Founder of She Grrrowls. Feminist Arts Writer for The Norwich Radical. BAR poet. Published by Nasty Little Press.
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